AA Speaker Recordings - Rocketed.org
AA Speaker Recordings - Rocketed.org

Episode 27 · 1 year ago

Stevie B Step 7 - Home Depot @ Spread The Word Group 2020

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Bring Alcoholic anthegolden Tex beachfor o Youeos anybody just a quick questions. The e have a twelve andtwelve JEM. Possibly I know it's a shocking. I you havegrandil. I lovethis betiful Thankyou time I Diyo Min. If I take eplassticg off the Tyou know w a I just have to just do this God. I offe myself to the to build withme and to do with me, as Thou will relieve me of the bondage ofself that Imay better do that well, take away my difficulties that victory over themmayber witness to those I would help of thy power, th, T, y love and thy way oflife May I do thy will always- and you know we say then there's no amen in the big book on on the third step prayer, but it doesn't matterbecause what Aman means is we agree right Don. We agree so we're agreeingthat any life run on self will is going to be a disaster amen. We agree and that's it that's what,because, let me tell you ray nose. I just Ididkget Grea big hug outside an just hoged him, and I did the third stedprayer with him as we're walking. Right nos one of the things that I hate themost high wedding ohide back there I seeo in my life, hated more than anything inmy life is construction and being involved in construction projects. I just it just is the most frustratingthing for me in the world, because I really can't do construction. So whatI'm an in it is a very powerless feeling. You know tonight I went to screwing a light plate. Do't know if that's what it's called,but Thetersa socker Pointa, socker, fot, SOCKI PLA too three of them to get toone sunking put in TAT, so I screwed in the soccer pach it shattered. So thenext one, I'm Gonta do it a different system. I went a little bit slower aand then I went a little bit slower and than I screwed in this lock. I had adrill. I had a gun, whatos Ta call me I screw that man and it was powerful. That was my first mistake: o Cewgi'm better with the screwdriverwit, the powerful one Jason that just I just destroyin, you know and it's aplastic cover that goes over and then gone to Gon Oliteray. I was like aHammadrom gone, and so I really don't like it. I don't likeinstruction. I, like the end results I like to come back when something'sfinished and your complements I like that. But I don't like the the moment amoment: screwing plates carryng, Toilets D and doing all that, but I didit today and and about twenty minutes ago the last toilet broke, and...

...we had already the toilet that brokeyesterday and then would change the floor today, because fom, the LEyesterday's blood and tonight we were having a new flox which was kind of funand so about twenty five minutes. Eight on five. You know everyone's done construction,I'm not saying I'm doidng construction, but I'm saying I was a constructionproject, so you know when your your covey construction, dust right and and the toilet just broke, so I'm notcarrying its toilet and eight or five. I know I gotto speak a verver short,you know, like I hate Thir and I'm still carrying toward that at eight UNfive. That's just the third step right. There right, Riathurdy, Tas, the Thir ofMadin decision during my life over to the care of God, as as as he is right, Scotty as he is,I don't know how you dwo people do it. I don't know how Constructon people doit to me. That's like astrol, physicism, Itis, serious. I don't. I don'tunderstand it. I don't understand how the power gets from there to the outlet.I don't get to me. It seems like it should not work,and that's really is that Sarah in the back is that SirHo they I have a sin. Kino Rag, your hand, please verse you for Sura Pleaserover here right. We have Playa scene plenty of set elseen tonight. We' Gen talk abothers theseventh step, and I know you may feel like what we've been talking about thesix and seven step for a long time, but I want to tell you that our defects ofcharacter will kill us gons of the seats over here to bder Bot. Thank youfor your Minbechir. Our defects of character will kill us. Our shortcomigswill bring us to our knees if it doesn't kill us and it'll certainlydestroy any peace and serenity we have inside us. If we are not entirely ready to have God remove thesetheefectsive character number one and number two to realize. We are not goingto be ane to remove them. So, let's jump to seven and realize I humbly needto come to the Lord and ask him to remove these shortcomes. You follow me.Were you out there waiting for Meto prayy tonight, O didn't we Spak by THALasnis, my first time oing this wa Ti Iyou did a great job. Can we tell hehow what agree job? He is Ahat, wsmour defects of character thatwe spoke about. Last week, by the way Chris is for you, last week's wasreally funny. Okay and Wa really good this week, not good, not Gong, to befun. So if you can try to get last week's talk and about defects ofcharacter and because, if you're suffering from stuff like I am youreally want to get to this place, were you'r just bringing your wheelborrowfull of defects and just dropping it at Gods. Dol. You know, God t a gave me this picture. One time I shared it with you Daniel about thatwe're on a potter's wheel, were the clay and he's the potter he's. Themaster were the creation, and that he's made us each individually perfect in our own way. Aand each of us have a different designwe haven't. We are. We are intended for different scultures right there and Wwe're intended for a different sculture. Some of us are vauses Johnny ubvols. Some of us are mugs Andrew Your Mot. Some of us are Bersteins...

Donny, your vers Gu Irish perstin and some of us are plates. Some of us are design and intended tocarry beautiful flowers, others greate food, other drinks, other candle sticksand we all have a different purpose myself. I want to be other things that I was intended to allthe time. Like I'm a thirty Muck, you pull me from the shelf and poursome hot coffee in me. I'm goingno deliver every time, but I really wantto be avise. I'm constantly wishing I was AVONC. I'm always thinking, that's nice, thatthat I'm a hot liquid type of stirting Mut type of Bu an B. I want people towalk in a room and go where did you get what thers some vansright there and what happens? Is I try to add stuffthat was never intended on me through my defects of character, and I try todo things that than try to make me something. I'mnot. I like. I stick on some pride and someanger and some greed and some guttony some lost some envy. Wers Tom he's tolpn mixstill here, yea yeahexactly, yeaand sloth. I add these things to me, not not evenknowing that I'm doing it because they're, not God, given none ofthose things that ive just mentioned to you are God, given God didn't hand, someone Wran, he gives you the ability to defendyourself and your family and and and but hit, doesn't give you rent. Hedoesn't give you fury, he doesn't give you that kind, so he doesn't give you envy.God wants you to be happy for other people's success and not and not wantto have their success. You want you to be happy for other people hit gives youthat, but in the in the in what happens inone when we want to be something wore, none defects, ofe character will comeon in the seventh ten. Our job is to getback on the pot of wheel and se to the poter. Please remove these shortcomings for methat make me undesirable to be able to do your work and to serveyour kids where his kids, we get back on the Potter's wheel, and we ask God the Father Tro ourhumilty. Please remove these shortcomings and you know Peter and Merner. Has thisgreat saying they says that that the process of recovery is never addingit's subtracting. I Love Whan. He says that at first when he said it, I didn'tlike it, and I took his impetor Li presentme Bthat we're always hering stuff to our recovery Andand. Then I understood we weresaying after a while that we were already perfect when we were born. We added a bunch of stuff that wasunnecessary. Babies don't come out, racist babies do not come out hateful babies do not come out fearful things happen and they and stuff to thePotter of wheel. It's our job now to get back on thatwill...

...and it's in humility knowing that I'mnever going to be able to remove these shortcomings myself. I love when I goto meetings, and I hear people say and I'm really working on patients and a and it's not going Gran. You knowI'm in my seventh step, Sixy, seven step and, and I'm really working on mypatients and my sponsor gave me this great exercise to drive thie speedlimit and I've been driving the speed limit for a month that I haven't gottenany more patients this. If it was that easy to drive thespeedlimit for a month to get patients, a lot of us will be driving thespeedlimin for a while. It just doesn't work like that. I mean it's. A greatexercise and willingness jourt sponsor says, drive this speed limit for amonth, and if you don't, you know that you're not really willing to have Godremove these teefects of character, so so that it's a great exercise andwillingness, but driving the speedlivin for a month or two dozen orsupernaturally after fifty years, Os of life. You know I joke this feedlimittoo much. Can you do you realize how patient I'm being right? Now? I ambeing incredibly patient. It doesn't work like that. The process of apatient has, God needs to remove my impatience. I need to get back on thePotter's wheel and I need to say: Tho God: Listen God, I'm entire ready foryou to remove impatience from me and then, as it's painfully removed from myside, because who wants to be patient? If we are busy, you see how busy I IAM Lis. Today I wasbusy. I woano tell you somehing. I think I'mGointo say this. This is the personal opinion. If you listen on the Internet,don't take it on Don' like thro barbs, I mean, I think, home deep boys eval. I think the entire company, withdesigned by Satan himself, Wel Theye four times SA. You cannotfind anything at home, Peoe, home deepl as a one hour commitment to get a screw. You can't just drive in Ta home depoandget a screw because they change. If the signed to work on your patience, you goto Home Gepo for light bulb, that's an album because where they used to be nowor change, and now what you just want to get a all I wanted, was it regularoutside spotlight, let lightbold that theyshould still have those they have them. But you will never findin my guaranteen, you all never findi, you got to get some guy that works tir,that it's resentful for you to bother him and I, after he gin get looked atme like. Are you freaking kidding me asking me about a light bode I wantedto say to him. Well why Didt you hide in the first place, if you had it in he place, I could findthat I wouldn't have to ask you have a hit behind Mvle dcontraption in theworld. If I want to ask election to turn on th life, how would it just notbe here I want to just be able to you know, I'm saying you got to go, thoughtwenty seven different categories to get a light bulb today and I had to go to home people threetimes today in three different locations and then after I had bought these covers for the ellectual covers outthe covers. Thankyou. Thank you. Thank you Eddie! Thank you for that, and andthat's the term I was trying to get when I was looking for E. I bought abox at ten and it seemed to me that if it's an outside thing, everythingshould fit inside that, but no there's different configurations, so the box intend didn't do anythingfor me because I don't know what you use the one that has no inserts in themiddle, but not for my stuff. So after...

I spent twenty five minutes looking forthat box and came home with it, the people that were doing the actualscerling in the covers said to me. This is not correct, so I had to go back in humiliation, nothumility, umiliation, like this desied to walk in today. Don't I discover today one of my shortcomings right now is patient. Yesterday I had no idea H, I didn'teven know I had. I didn't even know had a problem with impatience. AOS itittoday is a new day yesterday. If you would ask me what my main shortcomingswere, I would definitely tell you pride, anme and lot. I had none of that issues today. Youcannot have issues of bride, Anby or lust anhome dopo. It's Very Hardan. I had anger and impatience, and so I just want to say one morething about the home people there's two different machines for making keys. There was the traditional machine whereyou have someone help you and that you can give a whole set ofkeys and comes out in five minutes. There's another machine that works onyou inpatiencs. I didn't know that it's a self serve machine. It's a newcontraption, not everyone! I don't know very everyone. Deople have to put thatmachine. You do your own keys and each K is a five minute process. You have four key, an twenty minutes.You don't know it untilyou into it and then he's saying to yourself, as yousee, like all the other families just flying out of the other Kyo with theguy that helps them with home, sent genglly like Jinge bowns as they workan IEETAT. You realize there's so much stuff heredesigned to really work on my shortcomings. Is it amazing? The whole process is aprocess of having US surrender things that aren't working. You know if I would have waited for theguy in the regular Kios K, k thing that has been traditionally been there forten years. I could have gotten three or four sets tol, but they have this otherone, the impatient, Chiosiki keymaker and there's no line there because they want to see in they havecameras on it. They want to see who doesn't havepatience to wait for the guy. You know to me. I should have known whenever there's aline and no line, there's a reason. The the line area means there's valuethere, and people will wait for it, the no line which turns out to be fourdollars a TA okey. You know not like we're used to traditionallyright, so so listen to payer, listen to theseen step pare you ready for this Jo sit down. Thank you, bothank you. Thank you. Somuch you mean that I borrowed the twelvetwelve for no reason I tohi did. I mean this today,...

...my creer, I don't know where it is inhere Seti. I know this is the study. It doesn't corling my cream. I am now willing that you should have all of me, I'm now ready for you to remove everysingle, defective character that stands in the way of my usefulness to you and to my fellows grant me your strength as I go out and do your bidding amen. I'm not sure that was exactly,but the idea behind it is this. These defects AF, these shortcomingswill absolutely paralyze me have me bitter. Have me stuck have me makingbad decisions have me running from line to line. have me purchasing things thatI don't it's well, you know right now, people are sayingin their marriages right now across the country. You know what that persondoesn't make me happy anymore Okel, instead of a saying to ourselves. Youknow what I am not making myself happy, I'm not close toGod. Let me see what I can ask him to remove from me to make me moreusefulness. Useful to you and to my fellows today was a great crushing of my egaprocess. The homepeople will do that to me every time it is my art. It is my Achilles Tende and you know what you all have it alsoyou sometimes some of you. It's doctors offices, other people is dentists, other places, publics where you rush tothe line, and you have only two items and, and you rush there and there's anolder woman and she's got it definitely twenty on and you just you just besign to some. You want to call a manager. You likecoreally come on now. This is obvious: Jason Pwninteen, O J Jason. You knowlike watch. Sometimes it's traffic southpart is an amazing training groundfor short comings and traver. I think it's great. I love it. I watch people spen out of control. No,they woul eve lent you, you know what happens. No one lets you ind, you knowwhen they let me in. I waved to that guy for like ten minutes, I'm the guy that you see that when youlet me in I'm out of the window waining at you, I want you to know you did be aprober. I go. I go so far out of my way to letto thank you, I make you uncomfortable. I wait for you at the light with hazards on my car to tell you youhook me up, because I want to transfer some of thatjoy, a E. I have no one of the things I have no part with right now is traciybecause that has been crushed at me. Its been crushed yesterday, I had no problem withimpations you see. What's amazing is that in thistraining ground of sobriety you're going to find new things every dhiyg amI right am all right. I mean it's a Preson. Ithe same thing. That was you guys? Twenty five years, no changes itchanges. It's amazing how this whole thingchanges the longer we stay in the...

...beginning, it's about not drinking andthat drug right Du'ring your first year, wit Bouti month. I got oon thethat'sawesome, I still in your first year Nintan and so for you right now. It's a lot about staying clean in soright, tit's, a lot F, boutther, io, P and then that's the way. It should bethe meing one hundred percent. Should it should definitely be that and youreally don't need to focus so much in the first year so much on stem six andseven, it's important! I'm not saying just you just go around n town, youknow pup it all over everybody and creating wrecode in your presence,you're not doing that, but you really need to focus on the first three steps anddoing the tfirt and doing the twelve steps, but the Sixy sevenis going to bea lifelong proncess. I guarantee you if I ask people in here that are asoberfive years and more ten years or more fifteen years and more twenty years andmore twenty five years or more thirty years or more, if theyare going throughthe same shortcomings, if they have the same shorcomens that they had in thebeginning, that will say absolutely not because it changes right. Doesn't it change when I met youit this exact room ten years ago, Wer you let the jacket ridee in Er yourmonorcycle, we were ten years younger. We were different people back then,then, ten years later, we're dealing with other issues I didn't have envy.When I was in my twenty, I didn't you NVM, I didn't enve OIENVYEAH. These things were like upwhen, in my on Oer, then wo now the down Grav, it wins every time. So my issues that I had back then aredifferent than I have today, but listen to this, my issues was still absolutelytoday. Eighteen years later killed me and if I let them get up here Jason,then I will take a pill or a drink or a Toke. I will listen to the media. I'llgo and get marijuana I'll go get whatever it takes because I'll. Let myissues to find me, but my issues should never defye me. MyGod needs to define me because God could work on my currentissues. He doesn't change. The program, doesn'tchange the big book. Doesn't Change Clean House help? Others Trust got your memory will change, but the program doesn't so those principles are the same asthey were when I walked in here twenty seven years ago, I relapsed afterhaving seven years o'm back eighteen years, now, praise God and I'm notlooking to relapse against, so that I can prove me right that I'm a moon. You know what you win: Alcohol Thondten out of ten. I have never met an alcoholic drik drink that didn't kickmy foot and I'm not even listen, I'm not even a real M, I'm not even a purealcoholic. I backed into alcohol tonies, I'mreally a drug addic that developed an alcohol problem insoriety. What? How does that work? Ie got sothirsty in my first seven years of sobriety that when I took my firstdrink in my relapse, I liked it...

...and in my early years I only like drugs,so I would come to alcoholcs anones. I sit in meeting with my good friendWendy back there and I would say I'm an alcoholic, but I look at her O go, I'mnot really not old and unless you can admit your InimoSelf, that you are powerless over an alcohol in the PROGAM OT als anonymous.You are going to drink again and I didn't get that concept. Ithought. Listen, I'M A OI'M! Definitely a joking! That's an on paper! You knowe smoke stuff her out of a window for days on end. That's why my eyes don'tneed in the middle look at a rug in the middle of the old.Like that, you see that rub. That's a perfect example! I know the police are rushing in at anytime. I see that ROK I jump on the corner. I grab the end. I roll myselfup and I like, like a Chuchy roll, and I hide in the middle of that rug, and Idon't think anyone can see me as hard to do on Scotch. So I am not a pure alcoholic, but I'm definitely areal alcoholic. I'll. Tell you what, because it doesn't matter, what you useis the syndrome that you have before you used it and the moment I take a drink. It curesmy Ancosm it worth ten and a ten times the same thing. When I came in tonightI hug Ray, and I did the third step her of my my friends in real quick thatworks ten and that works ten out of ten times right down on the prayers work.Ten Ont ten time. Well, alcohol used to work for me, ten outof ten times. I've had this thing inside me since Isaid, since I can remember, since I'm four, I had a resentment against theentire neighborhood since I'm four, because when I walk to the playground,I could tell that there were different types of factions out there. There weredifferent types of groups and I, by a coincidence of birth, was not born intothe right family. I'm not talking about wealth. I'm toldmy having big brothers right and I are from the same town, raise the big brother, obviously to his younger brother, sohis younger brother and I hare the same age when his younger brother would walk tothe playground. His younger brother would get juice because he had a bigbrother. When I walked to the playground, I got no juice juice, peads. No one respects you. Youknow why, when I walk to the playground, nobody respect me because I had alittle short chumly system and you get no juice fo. Nobody fears you for that. Nobody picks you from the team. Firstfor that Li l come with the system M Oaedoino, so I had a resentment I hadinferiority complex from when I was very. Very Young. Tommi did yo brothers, you have brothers, Yo, H, Sam, but you're, very good, looking, so that she was showme to when you walk to theplayground. You get no joose, it's the same thing, and so I felt inferior fromthe very beginning, and I always knew my problem was because I didn't havebrothers in my block. Every family had brothers, the waggomans three brothers,the ones three brothers, the Commons three brothers, the mundingers three botes, the wagomins three brothers me short chubby system. By the time I took the first drink ofmanashevits Jewish table INE at twelve, I was like is exactly what I need. I am not going to be able to change Y,my family IM, half joys, HALF ITALIAN!...

You can no duce on that to you knowthat that doesn't give you any choce. I got shot in the eye when I'm twelveI'm walking around with onee no juice. I got no bro, but when I took that drink that drickallowed me to have a piece and a confidence about me that nothing elsewould bring me, including lying about every single thing of my life. I lieabout every part of my life. I lied about. Having a big brother, I toldeverybody. My brother was a professional football. I line. I lied about the car, I drove.I drove EFOR sylline visitof, my Namgh Wer in our neighborhood. If you're SOMmoney, you drove an oraxzy or a fireburn, I had a Donson N T. you're, an ItalianN, my neighboroo with Johnson Beachi, ten, no coose, everything in my life was designed tomake me feel horrible about myself. So I would change everything my brotherplayed in the professional for my brother is Jerry Boyarska he's aprofessional fotball player lot. My car, you think it's a Dodson, it's not it'sa twu e igh s line. I went and bought to he shifter at the store for fourdolrs and and I screwed it onto the thing with ith wit, Thi stick shift isor her shifter ive told everybody in Droppean I dropped the engine ow and Iput a new engine, an it's an it's Om and then I would and I would go Wut myPorcilinn confe cunch, embarrassing. When Karati kid came out. My area isthe karate kid. When Karate Kid came out this I'm so embarrassed. AntoverThas the gods, always Toi drissed up in a karate uniform, because I was itKarane and I put the Jupan crakid and I told everybody that I hadstudied under the masters: An Open Owl. I was never comfortable in my own skin. Now, if alcoholiic for you what it didfor me- and I know it didit for you- alcohol in any form- and it makes you comfortable in yourown skin- and you don't have to lie about who you are eanymore, because youcan become that person you're, not just going to give that up because of acouple D, wies or treatment you're going to hold onto that for aslong as you possibly can right, chise you're going to hold on to that and that's what alcohol in any formdiyforment. So when it comes now to the seventh step of having thes shortcoming removed forus, it's a life and death process, ththese shortcomies, an defects willabsolutely one hundred percent kill you or you want to kill yourself. My Creator, I'm now ready for you tohave all of me. I didn't want you to have any of me. Ididn't know who you were I'm getting back on the potters. Well, I'm askingyou to remove my envy. I'm asking you to remote my jealousy. I'm asking youto remove my loss, I'm asking remote my fury because I can't live like thisanymore. I am not happy Joyce and free in aregular store like Home Depot. It is a iladmind place. For me, there is no speece in serenity. UnlessI could see that any life lived on, selfwill is going to bedestructed and before you'd run out of here andsay you know what there's no solution. There is. It's him trust God, Clean House help, others Peter M says: carry the water chop, thewood, it's the same thing it's going to...

...take work and what I didn't know my first timearound, because in the big book, Ofgot, Olts and omous the step six and stepseven is in one page, one page: It's only one page in the big book theBig Book says in the forward. We are one hundred men and women that haverecovered from this seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. But you and Iknow Chris what happened some of those people that recovered in the first onehundred the drag againing die by the time they wrote the twelve andtwelve tadri right. They made entire chapters to six andseven because they realized that some of their friends that they loved diedof the defects of character, they were recovered and they weren't. So when you hear people today say,They'e recovered, there's nothing wrong with that. People really do believe andthey are recovered from assuming the hopeless state of money, no problem ofa nine Bouto, no problem but they're doing the work daily to stay recoveredfrom that disease. In the mind in the beginning of the first onehundred, they thought you do the steps you're recovered, we're goong. Now,let's go out and tell other people about it and it worked for a bunch ofthem, but a bunch of them. It didn't, and then they looked at the at the bigbook and they realize, where am my fault in the big look? Where am I goingdo better and you wer you can do better? Is Let's spend some more time talkingabout the step that separates the men from the boys and the women from thegirls and shortcomings? That's killing our flock flock thei. First, onehundred every time you hear someone go out, you're going no hear something likethat, the stop going to me Eagl they focused on making money pride. They started shoon, storing ego. They stopped going to meeting SlougLaziness Theys sleeping around town last. That guy was a real jerk. Anyway, Ego Lik. I was a hard guy to talk to anger. Every time we hear somone go out its,not what we're saying, wet, we're very rare, very rare. I mean people can havea van day. They can go to the hospital they can get. They can go to surgery.They can get something prescribed to them. That could send them out. Theycan dive fom that there's a million reasons to RELAF. Don't don't I'm notacting like. I know everything I'm saying, but I'm saying in my life Ijust gave you that my life, my life, was steroids. Bride sleeping around town lost, did go tomeeting SLAT. When I went to meetings, I drove my my sooped up sports car partto right the front ego. You know what helps me to stay centeredin this program. There was a guy in my homeroom TallTommy, I don't remember when he told Tommy Tommy Arn and I'm int toxs. I had seven years an now min dtox AntoToll Tommy is bringing the meeting in from Malrow's Park Group into theForelordo Hospital and beforelor o hospital back in theday they bring. You downstairs to the cafeteria and they have a meeting and most of the people there. Theydidn't want to go to the meening. So it was like only two or three of us and they brought us down to the meetingin our slippers, not slippers ther, there paper slipper and in our when I was in a gown, noteveryone was in a gown. I was on Suicide Watch, so I had a gown. Ididn't have my shoes, other people that were in the higher insane category.They had shoot somehow they felt that I was going tohang myself with my shoelaces at and fifteen. So I was you know: Shuffing Shuffling along it's very,very hard to look cool...

...in those slippers and also they takeyour Haindtell away, which to me was an attrocity. So can imagine how cool I lookd, I wasn't Dorty, but but no Hartelit wasa same forme ogay that might as well give me Fori that is like so my hair is, it is all a mess I'm in the gown. I got the sil slippersand there's Tall Tommy, bringing the meaning informy from one of my homeroobs from one of my groops tall time, and I remember two things I hope Inever forget from eighteen and from nineteen years ago. One is the TallTommy and one is the Richi from Liberty House. These two things I hope I neverforget, told Tommy Tommy Cani bore any sens for Soda I'd. Ask a guy from my home rout that was taken a meeting in there. ManGet eighty cents Hor, so I hoebut. I don't forget that I'm veryand I don't say Thi Suppose I want you to know, I'm very easy with buyingpeople things in early recovery. Don't come up to mean toward you Gota CatchEr in the day, because people took care of me an earlyrecoe Tey, so they bought me meals. They took me to the Maudramat. They show me how to shop. They took meto Plub, they took me and they put it soff in mycard, told Tommy gave me money for Sotan and then, when I showed up aliberty house a couple a couple weeks later from the forlinal hospital andRichie looks at me and he gos Stevie, you come Hou to speak and then he sees I got no fire in my eyes, I got no bounce. In my step I got my luggage. I would do two bags one for the clean one for the dirty one for the toiy trees, and he says like this to me: Stevie you comin, to speak and then hiseyes focused. I never. I hope I never forget this. Myfriend and my ly know that this is Babel for me and I always get emotionand then Ho said to me: Would you like a Sandwich Ihope? I never forget that I went from a guy that was drivinga sports convertible car big shot to the twelve top house on three piece matching Woochyo loggage and I wound up at Liberty House on my three piece of Miss Mencing, win,Tixi bag and then Rishe says me. Would you likea sandwich, and you know what I said: Don't like him. You know what I said.The richin Yes said me: You have a towel. Would you like a sandwich? Yes, I don' hope that I never get back onthe potof wheel and jump off because I think I've arrived. I hope I stay on the Potter's wheel andwhen EG ant pride and lovs and all the other defects of character in the shortcomies come back. I pray that I have a crowd of witnesses around me and I'mteachable enough that you can pull me theside say you know what you're reallyacting like a jerk, your pride, your Youre, really acting like a jerk. Youreally came across like this. You know you could ave answered more loving. Ihope I hope I pray that I have a team of people around me that bring mestraight to the tent step on any day and give me the golden rule of the tenstep. Were you kind and loving towards all, because if I keep those type of peoplearound me, those people that speak honesty into my life, then I'll neveragain have to be there again with the sandwich situation or much worse, because there's times we get itto ourlife. When nobody even cares at, we have a sandwich. Isn't that true, we'veeven burned the richies we've even burned the Richi bridge...

...and next week we're had to talk abouthow to get into some real action with a pen and paper and stop Pussy Foot and around andgoing to meetings with no sponsor and or whetther sponsor by name and talkingabout you', been in the FORSTEP for two years or eight months I's. Never two years,you Never Ein the force TEP for two years, because you always restartingagain four step. Eight months for step, FAImonths force, step Ai Munth, and you keep wondering why you're startingagain, because you're not willing to dump the garbage so next week we'regoing to talk about making a list. God pluss you guys thanks for Mein Chris Alcoho.

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