AA Speaker Recordings - Rocketed.org
AA Speaker Recordings - Rocketed.org

Episode · 1 year ago

Russell S. Step 6-7 Part 2 at the 12 Step House 6/24/2021

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Russell S. Step 6-7 Part 2 at the 12 Step House, Ft. Lauderdale , FL 6/24/2021  

My Name's Russell spats. I'm an alcoholic and it's a pleasure to be and I'm so I'm so happy that. I grateful that I got to watch Zenobia. Is that your name? Zenobia? And P pick up the Madayans. I want to. I'm going to talk a little bit. I talked a lot about something last week. I can go step six, I think, sex, sex, seven, whatever it is, and tonight we're supposedly on step seven. So I'm going to talk about step seven and whatever. You'll figure it out. So and so, if I'm going to talk about six and seven, I want to talk about Zenobian Pete. This isn't I don't think this is considered cross talk, and if it is what they had I'm going to go out and talk about it anyway. You know, a's like a giant tolbox. As a rent for it, every nut that walks through the door. I haven't found us. I haven't drinking a little forty years and I've been working this thing and this is just my opinion and experience. Okay, and somebody asked me whether I ever get nervous when I get up to talk these days. I've been doing this thing for forty years and and I don't, I really don't. Now you know, I should never, you should never say I really don't. Then next week I'll be a Basqui case. But, but, but, I remember my sponsor, Joe Snyder. I've said quite a few spawn sers and mentors because they grow old and they die. And I asked my sponsor once, and I know a lot of these things I've shared with group already, so I may repeat myself, but repeating yourself in a is not a bad thing. Sometimes the Lord, through your life, experiences, repeats, have has you repeat situations maybe tenzero times before you say I really do have to stop tracking. You know, you'd be surprised how many times you do the same thing over and over again for over ten and twenty years and then all of a sudden, G I cant out of be a. You know, you. So I asked my sponsor. I said you ever get resentments? He said get them, I give them and I you know. And there was a partner said Manna, I wish, I wish I could have that, because I was always worried about what other people think about me and and and what I want to do is I want to keep. I want to make the message real simple, real simple. That doesn't necessarily mean you're going to understand the message. You're going to get what I'm trying to say, but I'm trying to make it real crisp and real simple and yeah, you can under I'll put it to you this way. This is my sincere understanding of what it's meant in my life. I can't do any better than that. I can't carry the message to you, I really can't. All I could do is try to carry the message and that means I'm going to do the best job I can explain to you about separating the men from the boys, what that means and what humbling means and the attitude, because they're all about attitudes that want it has to have in order to get to that place. Because, you see, here's the here's what I think you know. When I'm asked to do the steps, I'm going to. I'm going to carry. I'm not going to try to Pan, I'm not going to I'm not going to try to say things that will make you like me. I might actually say some things, if I'm telling truth, that make you hate me, but that's okay. Just happen. If you hate me, that means you're listening to me, you know, and it's him, and that's how you got a message across. People hate you, they resent you, they think about me the entire week. I'll forget about all you guys want to walk out the door. But I mean, the only thing got me for the WHO is that guy? I gotta believe this, and then somehow it'll sink in. You know, it'll sink in or not sinking. So that's the deal. So I'm just going to tell you the truth about my experience and what I've read in the book. And now I may be wrong. That's okay. This is like there's a pretty country. But here's the deal. When you know, it's one thing when you're on the first step, in the second, seventh, third step and all stuff. And I and I know little confrontational.

Okay, I'm here to confer, to disturb the disturb the comfortable. I but but when I get around six and seven, I the adult steps, the ones that separate the members of the grown up steps, where in said, they're actually people here listening. There are people who are thirty years that they've been so jaded and they're so lonely and they're and that so and they're unhappy with their sobriety and every a meeting, they go to a meetings to stop drinking. They know they have to go, but they don't feel like they're getting any more to wear. But you're never going to know who those people are because they know how to talk to a meets young someone. I'm saying, they know how to talk to a meets and and you know that's just the way it's going to be. And there are and there are people here with with with time, who want to hear a message of depth and way. They don't want to hear they don't want to be fed milk. They want they want a sirloin stick. And there are, believe it, are not, even though you've been told this story that there are people here that a knew, that will be scared out the door and run away because I said God or Jesus or something like that. The truth is that the people are going to get this thing won't be running out of any doors, won't be going anywhere. That's fiction. If they run out the door, they will be running right back in to hear the message, because outside those doors is alcohol our best friend and alcoholics anonymous because, I said before, sort of force fleet and I'll say it mild and hill. So it's not too scare anybody. The great thing about a is where a giant self cleaning it up. You're not have to believe me. It doesn't matter. You believe you, whether you come around with you don't come around. Truth is every year, every two years, alcohol comes through. A wipes out all the bullshit and all the guys that say I ain't going to do that, or all the guys that are balking or they half measure guys, or you know, all that stuff. It just got to be wiped the hell out. They're going to go to jail, they're going to die on the street, they're going to know they're going to come back in for the fifteen thousand time and pick up a chip or something like that, because they because they have an inability to shut the hell up and follow directions and do what the big book tells them to do. And the big book is so abundantly clear. But if you're in alcohol key, one of the one of the consequences of alcohol. The drinking is not a consequence of alcoholism. I mean that's a symptom. The content. One of the consequence of alcoholism that centers in your mind, on your body is the ability to hear a clear cut message and water it down. The ability is that here a message was says, of a mere code of morals and a better philosophy of life would help us. We've been so over long time ago. Mire codes and morals, you know, don't help us. We had to have God's help, and that's where alcoholics get pissed off. It says. The apples on our neck means we get pissed off and said what it says says this sort of thinking, the thinking of the agnostic and the in the atheist, the sort of think that you could do this about God just based on Good Orly direction or group of drunks or all that sort of stuff, has to be abandoned. We had to have God's health. God is either everything or it's nothing. What is your decision to be? And and unless your brain dead or your rationalize things you tell yourself rationalize, are you just basically do this problem of the way you want to do the program and not the way it's actually spelled out, which is obvious in the big book. You know, unless you want to, unless you really want to just make believe stuff, you know, you'll somehow figure out a way to do AA light and, quite frank as a lot of people that's they were ten, fifteen, twenty years and they do away light, but they never get they never get the point with the rocket in the fourth dimension of existence. They never get some point where they're expensing much pen they never really get get the joy of living. They don't...

...get that stuff. They never really lose fear of people in an economic in security and they wouldn't even know what that life is like. And there are other people, you know. I'll call those the men of the women, who have gotten to the point where they finally surrendered, completely, completely surrender. God has become the central fact of their lives. They are convinced that he is living in their lot heart, which is deep miraculous, doing for them so they can't do for themselves. They understand they're on a new basis based of trust in and relying upon God. Listen to me, they never apologize for God. They never think that the thought of apologize, of the used the word God. are talking like got an a meeting. Would never even occur to them. And if it did, they wouldn't, they wouldn't, they would still do it because they are not scared of y'all. They're not scared of what you think about them. You know what I mean? You know there they so the idea of we never apologize for God. We never apologize for God. All men of faith have courage. They trust their God. We never apologize for God. They let they let God demonstrates in their life what they can do. So when I get to six and seven, I take the gloves off. I take the gloves off. You know, it's like, give you just a plain, concise, clear cut message and I'll tell you what. You take a yellow marker and you read the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, you read the twelve and twelve, you thread Dr Bob, the good old timers. And if you think that I'm stride in right, press God too much with don you be surprised. I'm mild compared to what they say in the big book of alcoholics anonymous. Do you know? In the big book of alcoholics anonymous, you know what it says? It says we encourage church membership, church membership. You know why they said that? Well, they tell you why they said that, because most of us do it. Most of the founders do it. You know, it says an alcoholics anonymous. We lose prejudice, lose resentments and prejudice against the organized religion. We begin to see where religious people are writing and whether right. We followed them along. You know why they said that, because they did that. Not Everybody does that, because you lot it all. I got a lot of people that have not gotten to the point where they've got passed out. But with they're only committed to God. And so what they do is they fight that and they poisoned the the rooms and they make other people believe that they're doing something stupid. If they mentioned God, they criticize. They send in the back, in the back of the room, they criticize. That's what they do. How many people in alcoholics anonymous? Where the book says see the relationship with him is ranting great events from the best you and Coelos others? Where it says we must get to this, what selfish as we must ever kills us. God makes that possible. where it says once you make that that serious decision, for God also its remarkable things happen being of all powerful, give you everything we need. You need if you stay close to me, performance work right. He is the new employer. You know, you understand what I'm saying. Be Up maximum work for God and other people. You know, how many people have read all that stuff, seeing God on the walls? Yeah, saying all that stuff. Everything I just said. That came right out of the big books. Not My opinion. This is our basic text. This is the program of alcoholics. Thomas Appendix to us is nice, but it doesn't subsume and wipe out everything else. Okay. How many people have ever been to an a meeting and we're going to say something and you use you didn't say it. How many people wanted to say something, a mean but you didn't say it. How you wanted to ask a question, I mean, you didn't ask it. How many people wanted to say something, even ask question about God, but you didn't do it. How many people said higher power instead of God because you felt that was more acceptable and God was not accept the Bull Inn AA. How many people think that it's okay in a to bash organized religion or cut it down? Go Wilson Sponsors, basically with Sam Shoemaker of...

Calvary Church and at dowling. Ed dowling was the one who came up. This is a man, that's the test, who is trying to grow in the image and likeness of is created with the capital city. How many people you have to raise your hands ever sat in the room or even apologize for God and would say someth about God and said, list I'm apologize, I'm sorry if I'm offending somebody. You ever say I'm sorry if that offends people? Why do you know why you're apologizing? Do you know why you're apologizing? Would you like to know why you're apologizing? Because you're scared of them? You and you know some. You don't catch that dis ease by coming the rooms of alcoholics. Anonymous. You've been scared of people your entire life. You know what you you know what people come in here for, not only stop drinking, to get to the point where they're not scared of what other people think about them. One of the promises are is you'll lose fear of economic in SCIRIT. Fear people in of economic in security. How would people, how would you, like to live a fearless life and not be scared of what other people think about them. Well, it ain't never going to happen. If you're scared to talk about God and a a room, for God's Sakes, you might be a little scared out there, but with this material we're reading, you know, with the material we're reading, where they say in the in the book when they talk about the men and the boys and some stuff I'm going to I rember read about to be scared in Aa to talk about God with all the material is about that. When in the when in the last page the big book, it says we will not know you. We cannot be sure because your real realize has to be on God. He will show you how to create the fellowship you pray. How can you read this material and have this stuff, that being a room, and be scared? And you know why you're scared? You're scared because somebody in Aa told you that you shouldn't do that stuff because you will hurt the newcomer. You will hurt the newcomer. W Wilson felt that way for a while and then dalk the bottom the good old timers. You know, he addressed it with Henrietta cibling and she said, you know, Bill, you've been fasing alcoholics all your life. You don't talk about God, you're not talking about the program, about bobs anamous and he agreed. I was back in the good old days when they had to get down on your knees. You know what I'm talking about. So I want to be very clear about this stuff and clear about the big book. You can read the big but you could do it anyway you want. You know, you can fulll around this thing. I know guys, I know him and I love them, who have thirty years. At thirty years they finally figure it out this thing and they jump into the depends of the pool. They stopped falling around. You know, I was thinking about Zenobia and Pete, but mostly Senobia was what happened with her. And I was thinking about a in the book of Luke, Chapter Seventeen, they talked about something called the the killing the ten lepers. Leprosy was a horrible disease. Thousands of years ago people died of it. They shunned them. It was embarrassing. You have to go to a leper colony and leprosy and the story goes, the story goes and and I personally believe it's true. But you don't have to believe it, and it does. You don't have to be a Christian, you don't have to leave in Jesu Rny, but this is the story because it matches up with what I see. It matches up with what I see in a this match is perfectly nothing has changed about this disease. Everything we have is common to man. As a matter of fact, a lot of you guys talk about Earth People like somehow they're better. There's not a problem, you have not a fear, you have not a loneliness. You have that Earth people who are not alcoholic don't have. They just don't drink. There are plenty of earth people three clocks in the morning that are scared shitless. There are plenty of earth people three clouds that are lonely. They just don't wake up and go to meetings. You don't know how lucky you have it to be able to go to a meeting where they talk about this stuff, wakeome the morning, go to meet and talk to people that love you and care about you and everything. Nobody out there has that. They just live home to work,...

...home to work, lives the lives of quive tespiration. So in the story of the ten lepers. There were these ten lepers and supposedly, as the carpenters going through, you know what the carpenter is, as the carpenters gone through the town, Carpenter, master, counselor he's going to do down, they lead with him and say please help us, because he was healing people and he looked at me, had pity on them and he said go show yourself to the priest, because in order to be certified that you didn't have leprosy, how to show yourself to the priest. And what happened was, and this actually, you may find this hard to leave, this actually has something to do with step six and seven and it has something to do with Zenobia. So it's lucky, isn't that? It isn't see how great God is. You know, we're on six and seven and seven, and he gets an Obian here so I can talk about something to do with step seven. So he heals the the ten lovers are healed. And here's how the story goes. You are looking up boop seventeen. It's okay, you're allowed, because you know what your no, no, listen, you're an AA and you're free to read whatever you want to read and you don't have to be in the AA coffin. You understand what I'm saying. You're free to grow. This is a launching pad. You understand what I'm saying. And, just in case you don't know, and Dr Bottom, the good old timers, the old the guy, the the man in that book said the books we found absolutely essential, which is what would that mean? What it's essential mean? What would absolutely essential means in order for long terms of bride for any sobriety? The books we are we read are first with the and thirteen sermon on the Mount of the book of James. So apparently they felt it was okay back then. You know. You know one of the things that alcoholics happens these motive things. He's motive things going on. They like the pet, they like the they like the massage. A bad motive over good vote. They say we don't want to scare away the newcomer, when what they really saying is we don't want people not to like us. We don't people walking out door and saying bad things about us, you know. So they're scared to really give them the real message. You know what I mean? You know, they we sort of beg them to do this stuff and everything like that. There's a lot of that stuff going around here. So so the ten leppers are are healed and one of the way the story goes, is one of the lepers, one of the leps. They all go will going over the priests so they can be certified and go to the baseball game and go back to their lives, you know, and see their girlfriends and stuff like. And one of the lepers goes back to where the carpet was, gets down on his knees and keeps on saying thank you Lord, thank you Lord, thank you Lord. And so this is the this is the conversation that happens after that. The carpet that looks at the Leper and he says, as he's as he's thanking them on his knees and he says, but we're not ten healed yet only one returns to give glory to God. He says you may go, my friend. He says your faith has made you whole. He does say healed. That says whole. And there is a lot of people to come to a a and they come to the doors and do a few things. They get healed, but only the ten leper gets whole because of his faith, because he returned. Now I don't know whether the the deal is one out of ten. As a matter of fact, my if you go by my cap, it's probably one out of a thousand. It was a statistic float around about only one half of one percent of people to come in here stay sober from twenty years and other people with the twenty years that aren't happy with this sobriety. But you know, when I hear some like Sonabria, I say, well, you see, that's a guy with the heart of the tenth lever. I hear PS is that's got with the heart of the tenth lever. That's what I...

...look for and I can't give somebody the heart of the tenth lever. I can't give you know, as Maverick, I run into ten people that are running out the door to show themselves to the priests. So then go back to their girlfriend and they last for five years or ten years or three months, whatever it is that I have. Others at a heart of ten leper and they will stick around and stick around and they hear God. They ain't running anywhere as mattering. They're eating it up. You know, because you want to why they're eating up, because they are into this program which is all about that stuff. And don't let people lie to a kid you. That's what it's about. It's about God. It's about an abiding faith in God. That's what the steps are all about, abiding faith in God, a commitment to God. Now let me read you a little life, a little education here. You know, I mean, I know you guys are brighten everything, but I want to read you a little something. I want to read you. I want to give you a a definition of a word. Has Anybody ever heard the word dilettant, dilantant? Do you know? The word dilettant means? I'm going to table. The word dilatop means so you can go back to your meetings and use the word. Don't think that's really cool. You know. Well, you're supposed to give me credit one time. Yeah, the first time you say, well, as I heard Russell say, the second time, as you say, was I heard said, as I've heard said, and the third time you say, as I always say. You know, that's that's like an AA policy. Understand I'm saying, Sheldon. So let me let me read you the word Dilaton. See, I give you shit you can use. You know what I mean. I'm yeah, it says dilaton. It says a person who cultivate. Listen to this because it's going to come up later on. Or we deal with step seven, a person who cultivates an area of interest without real commitment or knowledge. A person who cultivates an area of interest such a without without real commitment or knowledge. We have people coming here and they have an area of interest, in a a, an area of interest abstaining sober. But you want to know something, they have no commitment to it. They have that. They called them. They haven't. There's some of them even have an interest in God and even a belief in God, but no commitment to God. He's not the focus their lives. This is not a program that can help those people. I shouldn't say it's not from me. You got to help them stay sober for a while. It's not a program with these people are going to be rocking in the fourth dimension of distance, as it's the fined in the program. It's just not going to happen that way, unfortunately. In this program, God is everything or he's nothing, and I can tell you right now. A comes down on the everything side. If you haven't bring that out, it comes down the everything side. Okay, guess what? Hath measures value? Nothing, nothing, just mere physical sobriety. Yes, what? There's actually no middle of the road solution. What do you think of that? No middle of the road solution. It's either all or nothing. Now you have time, as I've had time. I'm not saying you come in here and you immediately. Some people do it faster and it you have time to sort of have a grow on y. You know what I mean? And I'm not saying that you're coming here and you got three hours and you got to talk like I talk or believe what I believe in. But if you are adopting a program which has to do with God being the centerpiece of your life, where you're praying to God with your folks in a God about God, you're you're developing a relationship with God and, by the way, and this is actually part of the twelve steps, the eleven stuff, where you are constantly improving your relationship with God, that...

...means if you got one year, you know you're doing your reproving your relationship with God. That means if you've got five years. You know you're doing your improving your relationship with God. That means if you got twenty years and you believe in God, you're going to church, you got to still be improving your relationship with God. It's like you never get to a point where you're not reproving your relationship with God. You know what happens when you try to improve your relationship with God and make him the number one thing in your life for forty years? You get like real committed. Some people to might not even like you, but by that time you really don't care whether they like you or not. You know, I because you've lost fear of people and fear of economic insecurity. So sure, but committed to God because that's the most important thing your life. This is the twelve and twelve. Nothing up my sleeve. This is conference approved material. Now, according to a and now I know we're all tolerant and certainly we all want people to like us, you know, and that's kind of stuff. And you would like my sponsor. What did you say again? He said, do you give reason? You get resentments. Get them, I give them. You know what I mean. We don't want anybody, God for did, we should go to sleep. God for did somebody. We should learn that somebody the same dead things about us. It doesn't like us. Man, I'll tell you, go crazy. You'd be calling up. Did I see something about you? I even apologize in and worrying about that Shit. You know, you know. I hear somebody doesn't like me, I say, God damn good, it worked. It works, okay. I mean some people will sacrifice everything in this program, everything in this program will will prostitute this program and everything in to do anything because they think drinking is the worst thing that can happen to somebody. I'll tell you, the worst thing that happens to somebody is not yet is stay sober and never get this program, go to the banquet and walk away with a ham sandwich. You know, sometimes drinking is necessary. I'll tell you how. I know it's necessary because in the big book about Bobsonbmous, in the twelve and twelve, it says the way we got a new perspective is by repeat humiliations. And the final question of our selfsufficiency. It says repeated humiliations in the file question of our self sufficiency. It says repeated humiliations in the final question of our self sufficiency, it says repeated humility. It doesn't say we get smarter, it doesn't say that we fix ourselves, it says repeated humiliations. The file question for our self sufficiency, which is how you got here in the first place, it means total, total, complete, consistent surrender. The means surrender worse. And sometimes that surrender happens because you lose your job. Sometimes it happens because you lose your wife or husband. Sometimes it happens because you'll lose a leg or an arm or you've got in a car fish. And sometimes it happens we goes your drink after five years and you got to couple like you. To happen is at also having guys. There's all sorts of ways that happens to alcoholics, you know, but I'll tell you if you're not on the right path, you know it happens. God has a very interesting way of dealing with recalcitrending alcoholics that Balk. That's sometimes balk at these things. I think we all do. So let me read this. On set, I made a statement last week probably bothered a few people. I said the three kind of atheists you remember what the six step is. One of the separates me from the boys, separates the that. Here's the definition. The men or the women are those who are repeatedly trying to grow in the image and like this of their creator. The idea of the attitude we have towards God, the attitude we have towards God. It's not a lukewarm attitude. It's not like well, I held hands at the at the meeting, I said the...

Lord's prayer. It's not like will I believe in God or the great fairy of the great gipsy or something like that. It's not, it's not. It's more than it's more than that. It's more than that, and let me tell you how it's more than that. Okay, let me read you something from our material. Okay, it's very simple. It says this is on step seven. Seldom it's and it talks about in step seven the problem. You See, there are atheists that don't believe in God. How many people understand that AA takes a stand on atheism. Do you understand that? There's a chapter called chapter to the agnostic? Now, I understand atheis are allowed in anybody's lawed in. You not believe in anything. In order to be a member. On order to be a member, all you need is a desire to stop drinking. You understand what I'm saying. Now, look, let me, let me say this to you. When I was young, growing up in a a, my sponsor used to tell a story. It was a big, cool a a story, but it's sort of got the point across. So you've probably heard it, but I'm going to say it again. And the story went like this. There was a there was this village up in the mountains. I don't know what I said this last week. If I didn't, I'm going to say this village up in the mountains and there was this giant gorge that zero foot drop and once a you're a guy, would come up there and he would string a tight rope across the gorge, no neck, and he would walk back and forth on the tight rope. But all the men, William, women, kids would watch him do it and he would go back and forth across the tight rope and there was a little boy, a little ten year old boy. The way the story goes is just why should the sky go back and forth on the tide rope? And he says to me. Says you are the greatest, you were unbelievable, you can do anything. He says. You really think? He says yeah, he says watch this and he takes a wheelbarrow and he takes the will barrow up and down and back and forth across the tight rope and the kid says you are the greatest. Your album, you could do anything. Says, you really believe that? Says Yeah, he says jump at the wheelbarrow. Said jump at the wheelbarrow. Yeah. You know, there there are two people at a there are two people at a football game. There are two people. Have two types of people in football game. There are spectators and there are players. There are people in the stands watching what's going on and there are people that are playing. You don't Sim seen the sixth step, the people who are the boys and the men. The boys are spectators, the men are players. They're down, I feel, playing now. If you're a spectator, you can become a player. You understand, or you could sit in the stands all your life and make believe that you're a player. This is what it says. And if you can't figure out what they're talking about, you know you can have it. You can be an atheist, which, as far as he is concerned, down the road. I mean, you're allowed to figure this thing out. In the old days they didn't give you that much time to figure it out. They say get down on your knees, but you're allowed to figure to take twenty years to figure it out. You can be it. You know you so they'll allow atheists and you just need to desire to stop turning. That's to get into the stadium. You could be an agnostic, which is like an atheist, but you don't want to say you're an atheist. Just want to saying, well, I don't know, you know, and and then you could be another thing, and this is talks about the other thing, the third thing. You could be somebody who says you believe in God, but you're not actually it's not really important to you in your life. You're not really committed to it. You believe in God, but you really believe in money. You believe in God and you really believe in sex. You believe in God, but you really believe in romance. You believe in God, but you really believe in cars and jobs and vanity and thinks. How you look. The truth is really don't believe much in God at all. You just sort it's like a rabbits fo to you. It's not the...

...central fact of your life. And so this is what it steps and set says in step seven. You know you got a lot of people that way that and you know you can tell those people. You can tell the atheist agnostics and the people that are sort of like on the fence because they get upset when they hear somebody talk about God and means, because they get upset even though the book talks about everbody talks about everybody knows that I'm quoting things out of the book. They get upset when somebody is actually saying what's in the book. They're not upset with me, they're upset with the words I'm reading out of the book of Alcohol Sadus because they don't like that program. They lie their program. They don't like the AA program they like their program. You understand what I'm saying. And so but the book says, really, I've seen her fell, who is thoroughly followed our path. Doesn't say follow whatever path you want to follow. So this is what the book says and you can try to figure out what it what it means, it says in talking about the people that are not ready to be at humble before God and make God send peace's life. It says this. Seldom did we look at character building as something desirable in itself, something we would like to strive for, whether our instinctual meetings needs were made meant or not. We never thought of making, honestly, tolerance and true love of Man and God the Deily base of a living whenever we had to choose between character and comfort. And then, so you can, stops to confort for pleasure. The characterbuilding was lost in it does or done dust of our chase after what we thought was happiness. And then it says this, this lack of anchorage. So if you're sitting there saying, well, I'm trying to get better, I believe in God, I do all this stuff, so I want you to listen as it says this lack this may be your problem, this lack of anchorage to any permanent values, this blindness to the true purpose of our lives. By the way, the true purpose of our lives is to know God, to get closer to God, and performance works well, you know. I know that because in the big book about Whol sidence. It says once we sincerely give ourselves to him, all sorts of remarkable things will happen. Be All powerful to give us anything we need to we stay close to him and perform his work. Well, so, the reason I know that? It's because I'm a student of the program of alcoholics, anonymous, and I know what about alcoholics. Nod says. My attitude has to be the only thing I should be caring about is if I can get close to God and perform his works, and his works are not only is to spread this message, and this message is about God, and to try to help other people here this fact. That's the message. It's not about not raising my hand because I'm apologized for God and worried about what people thinking about the okay, so it says. So, just so long as we convinced that we could live exclusively by our own individual strength and intelligence, for just that long was a working faith in higher power. Impossible. Was a working faith and a higher listen. For Ten, a good ten, fifteen, maybe twenty years. I don't know how long. I said I believe in God, I acted like I believe in God and I did a lot and, quite frankly, probably helped me. I been a benefit from it, but my eye was on God. While one eye was on God, it was another eye on the money. And he can't love God in the money. There was always another eye on I know God is great, but if I only had a million dollars, I'd be okay. I know God is great, but if I can only get laid I'd be okay. I know God is great, but if I only just put the pounds I'll be a what. Let me take you some not at nine percent of my effort was in trying to fix myself, get better, get wealthy. Of My whole life was about that. And like what five percent, you know, holding hands in a room, saying the Lord's prayer. But, and if you ever heard me complain, you was complain about the stuff. Here's what it says. It says this thea. It says a working faith, and I have how it...

...made it impossible. This was true even when we believe that God existed. You See, it doesn't matter if you say believe, it doesn't matter. You don't have to be a hate this. If you don't say I believe in God, but it's you're not going to but it's not going to do anything for you. This was true even when we believe God existed. We could actually have an earnest belief in God. That God existed, we could actually have an earnest religious belief which remain barren, barren without power, because we were still trying to play God's herself. We're still trying. You know, somebody in the restaurant asked me this question. He says, how can I get better? I said you can't. This is no, but I'm really trying to get better. I said you can't. How long eve been trying to get better? For years. He says he can't. So what He says you can't do anything to get better. Says you. He says you didn't understand what I was talking about. So listen, you have to be transformed. Only God can do that. You can do every step in the world, you can do everything in the world. You can run around the block, hockey, do anything in the world. You can hang on church, everything I got until you turn to him and face him and seriously and legitimately say coming to my life. I love you. I give my life to you. Until you do that, that is going to change. It's gonna do a lot of activity and you're going to fall backwards because you can't do anything. You know why? Because you're ready for this. You might have heard this for powerless. And there is one, by the way, who has all power, and that one is God. May you find him now. And there are people that are trying to find them and they can't find them. You know why? Because then we're worried about the fact that I'm talking about God all the time. They're pissed off about we can actually have earned this religious beliefs, which you made barren, because we were still trouble like God ourselves, as long as we play self freeliance. First, the genuiney lines upon a higher power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God's will, was missing. And then it says this right when you isn't this a shock? Right after that it says this. For us, the process of getting a new perspective was unbelievably painful because, let me tell you something, if you're an alcoholic, that's how we learned shit, that's how we learned shit. Somebody says, we why do I have to go through this? Because you're a freaking goof. That's why. There's just stupid. As John Wayne says, life is tough, even tougher if you're stupid. It was only by repeated humiliations that we were forced to learn something about humility. It was only at the end of a long road, mark my successive defeats and humiliations and the final crushing our self sufficiency, that we began to feel humility as something more than a condition of grubbling repair, grubbling despair. And then, you know, they talk about the first step, the step that I got you in here in the first place. You could be redoing the first I don't know. Is that the seventh step, whereas the first step? You're going to be reading the first step over and over and over and over and over again until you figure this thing out. And when you finally figure it out and get forty years and you figured this out and you're proclaiming them and you tell him all that, he's still going to be beating the crap out of you. You're going to learn the value of suffering. You'RE gonna learn what it says you, says rejoice when you you want us some you can to learn, even though you hate it. You can learn that there's something good at the end of other end. That's because it means that there's something that I need to learn, if I'm going through something, that I am something I need to surrender, that I haven't surrendered yet, that I haven't surrendered yet, and I don't make the rules. I don't know the shortcut. You know, I don't know what to say to you to get you...

...from three years to forty years or through years the thirty years in five seconds like that and you don't have to go through the pain and go through the stuff. But that's what this thing is about, going through, you know, marching through the difficulties in life, marching through and slowly but surely, constantly turning to God over and over again. And so one day you're living it, turned over life and you're just you wake up in the morning, you think about God, you're driving your car, you thinking about God, you go to sleep, you thinking about God. Doesn't mean you're never going to have pain, doesn't mean you're never going to suffer. It does mean you're never going to have fear, you know, but you wanted something that there's no fear or pain you're going to have, where it isn't tempered, tempered so that you can get through it because you having a biding faith that God's gonna help you get through it. You understand. So even when you're tested, you're going to leave life is great and you're going to be able to help other people and help other people because of your experience too. And then, and that's that's what some of you, not all of you, are going to want. You're going to want to you're going to want that's isn't that the step foot the steps. You want what we have and you're willing to go to any length to get it. Now you come in here. What you want. We have as you want to stop drinking, but after you've been drive for about night, you know, you know whatever it is, five years, ten, you have, you've been drive. You know it's not about the drink and you want, you want what that guy has with that could you want, you want something. You want more, you want more, and so that's what the seven stuff is all about. Thank you very much. I.

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